Monday is as Monday does!

Yep, we have arrived at Monday.  I have discovered that Mondays come with their own unique set of issues.  One that I discovered today, language.  My seniors were finishing up their presentations.  Friday they had amazing presentations, great speech patterns, despite being nervous, and no language slippage.  Today…well let’s just say I had some great presentations that received poor marks due to poor speaking, inappropriate language, and slang!!!! Yes, slang in a formal presentation and project.  *sigh*

I know that the world is different for those who are younger, I teach high school and have for many, many years.  However, I also believe that if you are given a set of instructions, time to work in the classroom where questions can be answered by both the facilitator and those working around you, you should be able to create something according to those directions. Maybe I am just out of touch, but last time I checked, if I am asked to do something a specific way and I don’t, there are consequences.

After several false starts today, my students finally realized I was going to make them do their presentation until they met the guidelines, or they were taking a loss in points.  Most opted to re-do their presentations.  Some however, were content to just take a loss in points.  The understanding of why putting the work in to do something right, simply didn’t compute for them.

I ended up having to put a happy blend into the diffuser for my own soul.  In addition, I took several small trips to the outside so that I could let go of the frustration.  I took in the cool, crisp air and let go of the feelings building inside.  I have to realize I have done what I can, and continue to offer them the chance to grow and learn.  If they choose not to take the chance given, there is not much I can do about it.  Thank goodness I have a great green space right outside of my classroom door.  I can ground, center and come back in ready to tackle the next thing.

This weekend I accomplished nothing and it felt wonderful.  Today marks the beginning of a new week, and a new start.  I am going to stay the positive route, keep my mind and body moving forward and find some new blends and mixes for the diffuser.  Lavender and immune are still going at home as hubby still isn’t well, but I will be back soon with something new!

Today’s Tarot: Eight of Pentacles – Slow, steady work…labor intensive but commit with a sincere effort.

So…..

It happens.  I missed a day. I was doing so well too! However, I have decided not to worry about it.  I realized it right around 11 p.m. last night and decided I was too tired to type something up.  It had really been one of those days.

I am a reader.  I love books.  The issue when I read is that I tune everything and everyone out.  I get so focused that I forget the real world is happening.  I had taken a break from reading last week to see what it felt like.  Go figure, dishes got done, things happened with the hubby, grades were inputted, litter was cleaned and the blog was going strong.  Yesterday, I fell into a book series, actually two.  This means I am not up moving, I forget to do the things I need/want to do and I just read.  Not really healthy, at all.

This also leads to short tempers, miscommunications (I’m not actually listening when people are talking), arguments and of course nothing happening.  By 11 p.m. I was truly wondering who would miss me if I wasn’t here today. Hubby and I had argued and then he left for work (early) so we didn’t really resolve, although we did text, my oldest child can’t make Mother’s Day, I did something to upset the daughter and she told the youngest  she “needs space”, although I can’t actually recall talking with her recently, and of course the argument.

Tears were my companion as I went to sleep last night, I woke up multiple times in the middle of the night, sometimes with anxiety, sometimes still crying.  Good news, here I am today.  Kids have projects to work on, AP exams to review for and the end of the year to look forward to.  My resolution, get through the day.

I pulled a tarot card today (something else I had not done yesterday), got the 3 of Pentacles again. Guess I need to be looking at the amazing kids I have, let them be busy in their own lives and minds, and figure out the new journey in front of me.  I must have done something right, 3 of Pentacles says it all paid off in a positive way.

Today the oils are Breathe Easier and a Citrus Cream Blend.  Happy scents, happy moods and just maybe a happy day!

Have a great one…I promise to get back to informative stuff soon.

Self-Loathing

You know when it is really bad and you can’t see past all the things you have done wrong, or you haven’t listened to, or you didn’t get done? Those times when it seems like you are more of a burden and create more of a hassle for others than helping and taking care of yourself and your business? Yeah, me too.

When it seems like just emptying the dishwasher and making dinner are taking up so much energy there isn’t anything left to do what you wanted to get done. Last night didn’t see me clearing away space in front of the altar or getting my mediation/exercise space cleaned.  In fact it barely saw me feed the dogs and go upstairs. I did write some on my book, and then I read a little. I felt it was an accomplishment this morning to get up with enough time to shower. Yep, we all have those days, me included.

Since it was one of “those” day, I decided to count the things going right.  By the time I arrived at work, I was in a good mood and ready to talk with and help the teenagers who come through my life every day. While I am not infallible, and I have the same kind of days as everyone else, sometimes the fact that I got up and got to work on time, are enough to reset the day. Try to remember to count the small things: a shower, a matching outfit, you brushed your teeth, traffic was not bad, or you listened to your favorite podcast when it was, those are all wins, give yourself credit for them.

Hubby and I have agreed on a night out to dinner and a shopping trip to his favorite lingerie store. I have made sure this evening looks different, to help reset tomorrow.

Today’s tarot card: king of cups –

The personality of the King of Cups is a combination of the positive water energy of the Cups suit and the active, outward focus of a King. He is wise and understanding, with a deep knowledge of the world that comes from the heart. He is a teacher and way-shower who guides his students with loving attention. He cares about others sincerely and always responds to their needs with compassion. He heals with a gentle touch and a quiet word. He is calm and relaxed in all situations, seeming to know intuitively what is called for at any moment. Others turn to him for advice because they know he will listen attentively. There is always a peacefulness around him that others respond to. He is tolerant of all points of view and shows patience in the most trying circumstances. He gives others freedom to grow and develop in their own ways without asking anything in return.

In readings, the King of Cups asks you to take the kinds of actions he might take. For example: responding calmly in a crisis, using diplomacy rather than force, reaching out to help, or accepting a different point of view. This King can also represent a man or woman who acts as he does, or an atmosphere of caring, tolerance and understanding. In a reading, he tells you that his special energy has meaning for you at this time. Let yourself be inspired by this King in whatever form he appears in your life.

 

Meditation

We all know we should, even if it isn’t part of a religious practice, it is now common knowledge that meditation, or purposeful breathing, is a practice every person should put into their day for at least 15 minutes.

The Mayo Clinic says “The emotional benefits of meditation can include:

Meditation is a simple practice in its purpose.  It simply helps us keep grounded and do a check in with ourselves. We can stay present better, our minds don’t wander as much or worry as much if we meditate.

However, the practicality of incorporating meditation into the busy lives we all have is not quite as simple.  One would think, given that I am a practicing pagan/Wiccan that I would make this a part of my daily life.  The truth is I am also a full time High School teacher, a mom of 4 boys (2 of whom are at home still), and a wife. What that means in reality is that when I have 15 minutes, I don’t sit and meditate. I have it on my planner as a daily practice, but I haven’t been able to check it off in weeks.  I have three apps on my phone, two of which remind me I need to do this; I simply snooze them.

I am very aware that I need to get this practice back into my daily routines.  My feelings of being unsettled, ungrounded and flighty would all go away.  I also know that to do this I need to spend about 5 hours cleaning the space in my bedroom where my altar and meditation space is set up.  This has turned into the “house everything not in use” space for us. That alone is enough to make me give up.

This ties into yesterday’s post about everyday being a new day.  Today, when my husband goes to work (so really tonight), I clean my room until it is where I want it to be and where I need it.  My mental health isn’t horrid, but it is enough that it is beginning to wear on me.  When that happens, things slip and slide into oblivion.  I don’t want to clean, I don’t want to get off the couch, I don’t want to do anything.  This is a spot I have been in often lately, but I am working on it.

Today is the New Day/Fresh Start I was talking about yesterday.

Keeping Track

So life happens and then well life happens.  In all of that sometimes you forget the things that are important that don’t seems quite as important.  Exercise, eating healthy, getting your thoughts in order and written down.

So now I am trying to catch up.  I have some papers to finish grading, some meal planning and grocery shopping to do, some cleaning that didn’t get done.  In addition of course, the dogs need cleaning up after and the rest of the house needs to be picked up.  There is stuff to list on eBay and a few small things that need looking at.

I did manage to get my Third Lesson in my Third Degree at Sacred Mists turned into my grader, which is very exciting as I loved that lesson.  Lesson 4 is going to take a lot of research so I am reading over the questions, have a few books to dig into and a lot of internet time to get started on. I do love the history questions, and they are so important to where we are now as a practice, but sometimes it is hard to get through.

I am not sure if I am on track to actually start my next step in the summer like I thought.  We are buying a house and taking a rather fun vacation (as the oldest child at home is going into the Navy), so money may not make it possible to start the next step until the fall, however it is still my intent to get a degree in spiritual mentoring. Sometimes we have to prioritize differently than we originally planned.

What do you do when things get out of whack?  I still have my planner and I love it.  I have ordered one that looks just a little different but from the same place (personal-planner.com).  I love that I can customize.  I still have some more to do when it arrives, but I am set for what I need/want it to look like.  It will have all the spaces I need.

My favorite planner stickers right now are the Grumble and Kind (Grumble and Kind).  They are fun and whimsical and the shop owner is an amazingly talented and responsive woman.  I have several others as well that I will detail this week.  I am excited to show off some of the planning when the new planner arrives.

How are you doing?  What stickers are you using?  I have a lot to show you this coming week and I can’t wait!