Healing is a Process

I haven’t pulled a card yet for today. I’m going to…and I’ll add it to the post before I publish. I wanted to just get a few thoughts down before I did anything else. It has not been easy. It has also only been a few days, even though we knew about 12 hours before the real decline that it was coming. I was able to process and be calm, call on the spirits to help him cross peacefully, and to bring healing energy to my husband and I and the house before it even happened. Even with my own beliefs, my own brand of processing, I realized late last night that you still have to grieve. My husband broke down as we were going to sleep, finally able to cry and let go some. This morning I saw that he was able to say thank you on the FaceBook post he had made, the first time he had even looked at it. This morning he texted me at work to say that he was “good”, and he even stopped and got himself coffee at Dutch Bros since they are doing a drive for the Davis Officer that was killed. It was nice to see/hear/read that he was doing a few normal things. This doesn’t mean we aren’t sad, it doesn’t mean we don’t still look for what is missing, but I am glad that he isn’t sitting on the couch not getting up anymore. To heal you have to accept, and begin to live each day differently. I think we are finally going to be able to start that…

What this means for me is that I will be able to begin the process. I went back to work right away, and needed to take care of them and be strong. When he goes to work this weekend, I will be able to allow myself to recognize the hole and the whole of what has happened.

I do feel derailed. I am still waiting on my High Performance planner to arrive, and with this as well I feel like I have been set back in my goals, my progress. I looked at the checklist on the whiteboard this morning and even the everyday tasks haven’t been done. Time to take charge again, and to allow myself the feelings, but not allow them to dictate my life.

I have enrolled in a course on how to be a life coach. It is self-paced, and I want to find the time to be able to get to it. I have my tasks for Sacred Mists that I need to finish up, and work on my 3rd Degree Course so that I can earn that title as well. I have plans, and none of them involved being stagnate or living in a house where the daily tasks fall by the wayside. Need to get things done…processes can take a while, but you can’t just sit and wait for them to be done.

I bought two new tarot decks that arrived at the beginning of the week, and I haven’t even opened them. Something I need to do…for me. I know what great things the weekend has in store for me. I am ready to get to them. I know that I am allowed to grieve, I also know that I can’t allow it to be all consuming, for any of us. Time to sage the house, burn some cleansing candles, and begin the process of moving forward.

Today’s The Universe Has Your Back card: I find a deeper meaning and personal growth amid the discomfort.

Intention: I will embrace the feelings and move forward

Personal Reflection: Of course. I don’t even know w hey I’m surprised anymore. I do this everyday, pretty much, and I’m still surprised when it happens, almost everyday. As we go through painful experiences, recognizing that they help us grow, become more empathetic, and allow us new opportunity to create what we need in our lives is very important. Don’t run from the pain, grow in a healthy, positive way.

Create Your Own Reality…and then live it

Often times we are told how we should live, where we should work, what is right for us, without anyone checking in on what it is we want. We allow others to create the reality that we live in, with little or no input from us. This is often the case with those who follow a “different” path in religion or beliefs. It is difficult when one does not “conform” to the holidays or the calendars of the societal norm. As we approach the season of Yule, I am often reminded of how intolerant and selfish others are. They focus on their wants and needs and they don’t create a space where everyone can feel accepted or wanted.

As we move forward in this time of year, a time often for reflection, and for growth, it would do us all good to look at who we are. Are we who we want to be? Are we allowing others to define our reality, or are we living what is expected of us? Are we choosing to the be best we can be, to be accepting of those around us, or are we falling into the same shellfish category that has put us in someone else’s reality as it is?

I am working on me. I am learning how to navigate the world outside of me in a way that allows me to be the best me I can be, and to not fall into other’s reality. I will do things my way. It isn’t that I won’t listen to the ideas of others, or incorporate them, or compromise. What I won’t continue doing is following meekly, allowing myself to be hidden or pushed off because someone expects something different from me.

This will partly include new clothing integrated into an already eclectic wardrobe. Pieces that fit who I am, and who I want others to see me as. So this weekend is purge the closet, keep what I want, shop for what I need. This will also include the continued cleaning of the house, and the making of candles. Those two things have actually been going well.

I will also be getting back here, and making the time daily to create space for tarot (which I miss tremendously), for personal study of the things that interest me, and for my own spiritual and emotional growth. This time of reflection is over, it is time for action. I am not going to stop being me, simply because others aren’t ready to see.

Here is my final thought…create your own reality, be you, and live where you want to be. Don’t let others dictate that.

Tarot today: Ace of Swords

“As the great bard said, there is nothing either good nor bad, but thinking makes it so.”

Core Meaning: An opportunity for a new way of thinking

I don’t hand pick these for the topic of the day. I always do a single card draw to help my day through. I did this draw after I wrote the post. This card is a gift. Be careful with it though, for it represents a new way of thinking, but if mishandled can disappear in a second. Take this time to reflect, to look for the opening, to act wisely, and to create that reality.

I’m Better!

Yes, that’s right, I have finally kicked the nasty creep and crud. That means we should be getting back to regularly scheduled blog posts and some interesting information.

Today I wanted to discuss altars. What an altar is, what is can be used for and why you might have one, no matter your beliefs. Merriam-Webster.com defines an altar as:

1: a usually raised structure or place on which sacrifices are offered or incense is burned in worship —often used figuratively to describe a thing given great or undue precedence or value especially at the cost of something else sacrificed his family life on the altar of career advancement

2: a table on which the eucharistic elements are consecrated or which serves as a center of worship or ritual

So…with that as a working definition, do you have an altar without realizing it? Is there a table or countertop in your house where you have things you value or that represent your faith? If you answered yes, you have an altar, whether you realized it or not. Often times we have more than one without even realizing that is what we are creating.

I burn incense on the table next to my altar. The only thing I burn on my altar are the candles associated with the magick I am working or the meditation I am focusing on. I am also, not a big incense person. I have more of a tendency to burn a candle (which I make), with a scent that works for me. So, I do differ from the working definition in that way. Candles just make me happier, so that is what I use.

My main altar is in my bedroom. It is the one that I change with the Sabbats or the celebrations in my life. The one the crystals, and the table cloth change regularly, that I do my magickal workings at and that I do my meditations close to. However, I have several scattered throughout the house. The top of the china cabinet in the dining room is full of crystals that have been placed as I felt they were needed, along with totems to my spirit animals. The bookshelf in the family room has a shelf that is slowly getting taken over with the things I feel need to be in there for us to be more centered and family oriented. My husband started one without realizing it on his dresser, as we collected things he wanted and felt drawn to.

Altars are simply places we put those things we value, that show what it is we hold as a belief and a trust within ourselves and our faith. So, do you have one or two?

Today’s tarot:

Three of Pentacles: You’ve mastered one phase of your chosen career and you’re looking forward to the challenges of the next. The praise you receive makes you work harder than before – use it as inspiration Oaks you work your way toward your goal. Expect a nod from this higher up the food chain but not much more than a grunt from those below; you can’t impress everyone.

Key Words: Recognition, Hard Work, Skill

Fire Magick

As Fire is both destructive and creative it its nature, it is easy to use, but must be treated with respect. The qualities most often associated with Fire Magick are:  Brightness, Thinness and Motion. It is considered to be continuously Active, with a mode of On all the time.  From the beginning fire has been used to warm our homes, cook our food, ward off darkness, to light our path both from man-made and the sun and of course it fuels the passions within.  We use it in modern times to bring us closer together, to sit within the warmth it provides and bond. Unlike the other elements Fire does not come from a natural state. Fire only happens when it is consuming other elements. Fire is the element of transformation.  It takes the energy of what it is consuming and converting it to another form: heat, smoke, ash, and light.

You can feel this power in its various manifestations on any sunny day, when the Sun warms and lights your way.  When the logs crackle and the smell of smoke is coming off of a burning fire, the manifestation is often comforting. When you gaze at the flame of a fire or candle and you lose yourself into the energy being emitted.

While fire has a destructive aspect, we can control that aspect, and it is in that control that we are able to gain benefit from the element’s energy.  A lit candle helps to limit the power of the flame, as well as call it forth. In addition, candles can add color magick, however that is in another post. While we often rue the destructive nature of fires, especially when they are within the limits of a city, we need to be able to see the positive aspects of those we can.  Often forest fires help to clear the underbrush and make way for those things that have been dormant to come forth from the Earth.   Thinning forests to create new spaces for those things that have not been able to grow for many years.

 

Often times herbs or flowers will be added to a bonfire or a hearth fire as added magick. Fire is often the only way to add those things to the magick we are using.  We need the consuming factor of the fire to be able to access the correspondences of the herb or flower we are using.  Fire is a powerful tool, an instant way to get the will and energy into the world.  As an active element it is an almost instant magick tool.

I use fire magick, in both my hearth and through candles almost daily.  Candle magick (as you know from a previous post) is my favorite for a variety of reasons.  Fire is my personal element and I am very much aware of that.  I feed my fire element daily and I work within my will and intent using candle magick.  I keep my home warm as well as protected using the hearth.  In the summer I am a Sun Worshiper.  I am a Leo by birth, and I have fallen into the path of the Sun and Fire with a whole hearted love.

What element speaks to you?  I will be discussing them all… don’t worry 😀

Behind…always

Do you ever feel like you are never going to get everything on your list done? Like, there is so much on any given day, and whatever doesn’t get done rolls to the next day, but there is already a list there that would have taken the whole day?  I am in that spot.  I do not feel like I am ever going to get caught up or have everything done.  

It seems the dishes are a twice a day chore, which then takes over the spot of something else…and the accomplishment of getting the kitchen all done a few weeks ago, yeah well it is now in the same state as it was before I started.  So, when I wanted to be cleaning another room, I am back in the kitchen re-doing that.

In addition, I brought home real work, not Sacred Mists or housework, but actual essays that need to be graded, and some lesson plans that need to get written (I don’t see any of this happening).  So I am behind in work, home and play.  Feeling completely overwhelmed and like I can’t begin to take a breath, I want to just quit. Yep, you read that right, I want to quit.  

However, that is not really an option, obviously.  I am going to take the time to write the blog, meditate and re-center/ground and then take that energy and begin tackling everything that needs to be done.  I can only do what I can get done, and I need to focus on the fact that I am trying.  I will light a candle, start the diffuser and keep myself sane (I hope).

What do you do when you are overwhelmed?  Do you ever want to just quit?  Don’t!  Remember you are not alone in that.  Come visit and leave a message if you feel that way.  We can talk through it.

Candles

Candles are so important to  everyday life here.  As a matter of fact, we were burning so many candles and spending so much money that it became cheaper to make our own.  We researched and found the best way to make candles and now make all our own soy container candles and candle melts.  It became such a great thing as I gave them away for gifts that I began selling them.  You can see what I do at Touch of Magick Candles and feel free to ask any questions.

Why are candles so important?  Well in magick there are many associations with candles.  Fire, color, scent.  Candle magick is an area within my practice that I am an advanced student and practitioner.  I am hoping to rewrite the lessons and begin teaching candle magick at Sacred Mists very soon.  Fire is my element and candles help me focus using that element.  Color is a correspondence area that enhances fire magick and candles can be made in any color.

Scent of course is simply something that we can all relate to.  Whether it is  a sugar cookie scent that brings memories of happy childhoods, or winter sleigh ride that helps the inside of our house smell like the outside sometimes.  Scents are important to everyone whether they realize it or not. They trigger memories, or bring feelings of comfort close to the surface.

When working magick with candles they enhance your energy and carry it further.  Fire magick is one of the more intense magicks, and should be handled with care.  Candles are perfect for learning as they carry smaller flames.  I often do magick with the fireplace or the fire pit outside.  So much energy to draw on.  However, for daily magick and healing spells (unless something significant is going on) I use candles.

I am in the process of making a candle of healing for a family.  I am going to be using a combination of evergreen and honey suckle.  You wouldn’t think it would work, but it smells amazing when mixed together.  I will be making it purple, a healing color, also it is for a little girl.

Candles bring to home the sense of completion, of warmth, of being complete.  Colors and scents play more of a role than most people realize, but know that you will often choose those intuitively and for a purpose, whether you know it or not.

Do you burn candles?  What are your favorite colors and scents?  Do you need a healing candle? Can I answer any questions?